Protecting the Friendly Skies

How do I love thee, TSA? Let me count the ways ...

An article in today's Style section detailing makeup products permitted in carry-on luggage post August 10th's arrests in Britain led me to the TSA website and their list of what is and isn't allowed in airplane cabins these days. And it's fascinating.

The tiny but potentially deadly needlework scissors I accidentally left in with my knitting? Just fine. Same goes for corkscrews (which will please Midwest Medved no end), safety razors, toy weapons, cigar cutters (not that there's anywhere to smoke anymore), cuticle cutters, tweezers (because airplane bathroom lighting is excellent for eyebrow detailing. Seriously.), and up to 4 oz of personal lubricant.

On the other hand, you're not supposed to bring nail polish, shampoo, liquid foundation, lip gel or mascara, creams or lotions. Can anyone explain to me how personal lubricant escaped the general creams and lotions category? Are we trying to make sure the air marshals can still get into the Mile High Club?

Personally, I prefer to take my chances, under the auspices of the don't ask, don't tell policy. Nothing I don't want to lose gets on the plane with me, which means I'm packing bottles of perfume for the first time in years, but I'm willing to risk losing my lip lacquer in order to have it available as the plane descends. If you fess up about your tube of Chapstick, chances are excellent they'll take it away from you. They didn't even question me when I flew out of JFK on August 13th.

Emmys - The colour purple

While there was lots of black at the Emmys this year, the ladies in aubergine made a striking statement, a la Evangeline Lilly, (right). When they didn't muck it up with too many necklaces a la Sandra Oh (whom we normally consider a FG of the highest order), or ... well, I know Ellen Pompeo did better than usual, but she's still not living up to her potential.

Paula Abdul showed us why flowered frocks just don't cut it and over-accessorizing is the death of any outfit. Sofia Milos, (below) on the other hand, showed Paula and the rest of us how to wear a pattern on the Red Carpet.

I didn't really love those considered the "Best-Dressed" of the night - Tyra Banks, Debra Messing, Portia de Rossi - although Heidi Klum was spectacular. Katherine Heigl looked amazing ...ly like Charlize Theron, and there was something going on under her right breast that wasn't quite right.

So an evening with something for everyone, methinks.

Shuesday: Embellishments, baby

Shoes are getting fancy for fall - Christian Lacroix is showing big velvet bows, Miu Miu's boots are studded, Prada's passionate about paillettes, and Louboutin proffers platforms in leopard, suede and lace, for those of us who embrace our prerogative to change our minds. Haircalf is everywhere, on bags as well as shoes, and most often in animal prints - you know something's gone mainstream when J. Crew's overcharging for it.

The FG is a fan of these Isabella Fiore grosgrain ribbon pumps - slightly more reasonable in price, and just darling. And this pony print bag from Furla is very fun.

Perpendicular Girls

At the offices of the thick fashion monthly Runway, the perpendicular girls in John Galliano and heels race through the corridors like cranes on point;

Carrie Bradshaw called Big's Natasha an "idiot stick figure with no soul", and I've always referred to them as Lollipop Girls - a round head teetering atop a stick body - but I think perpendicular girls is far better. And we have David Denby, film critic for the New Yorker, to thank.

Embrace your fate

So although the weekend was spectacular weatherwise, this week has been horrific. Where horrific equals temperatures of less than 75. That's less than 24 for those of you in the rest of the world.

And, not that there's anything else going on, I decided to work with the weather (this time) and started fall shopping. (The fact that fall clothes are among the best out there played no role whatsoever. Riiight.)

This is a great start. A little Catherine Zeta-Jones, no? With oversized sunglasses and a black skirt with a slit? Striding down a city street en route to cocktails? I love fall.

Shuesday: 'But a corset you adore.'

Shameless thievery today from the blog of the Manolo, but the more people reading this article, the better. National Geographic, in the spirit of the magazine that brought you your first bare breasts, has an article on The Joy of Shoes, complete with fabulous photos such as the one stage left. And House of Harlot is a great band name, no?

The Scot is On Notice

Amazing how little phrases creep into the vernacular - first Truthiness, and now /On Notice/.

And so it was this weekend, when Marooned came to town, that The Scot was put on notice from across the border (and a substantial span of water, I might add). First, for leaving town for The OC when Marooned made the trip, especially in his position as President-elect of the Official Marooned Fan Club, and secondly, for dissing Rufus Wainwright's version of Hallelujah. Apparently, and TK swears by this also, that the Jeff Buckley version is the definitive - I'd be prepared to argue that The Master does the definitive, but capital /W/.

Aside from the Notice, it was a great weekend - good drinks, good talks, good walks, good BBQs - I think men should ALWAYS be present at baby-showers, they add a certain note of ... panic to the proceedings - good brunch and good beach time. And then a far too early ferry ride.

You can take me out of Manhattan

but you can't take me out of my shoes.*

Unless the shoes are borrowed for special purposes. Ahem.

New York was, as always, spectacular. Once I got there, of course. The weather was beautiful, the neighbourhood was tempting, (it's how-stun, baby, how-stun), the Thing went well (wethinks), and we spent a good deal of time afterwards wandering the streets of Brooklyn, the Metropolitan and Union Square (DSW!). The hotel was fantastic - beautiful view, pillows, and the very black goldfish was beautifully complemented by the very white flowers that arrived shortly after I did. Found a lovely sushi place on Broadway, quiet and with excellent sashimi, if slightly poorly timed service. When in doubt, sit at the sushi bar, especially if things are quiet. I startedto think I was getting the hang of the place. That has to be a good thing, right?

I don't really identify with Miranda, but it was the quote that made the most sense.

Shuesday: I'm bringing sexy back

Everywhere I went in The City, women wore these, or these, if you're into a little bling. I'm not exactly sure how they walk around in them all day on the unforgiving streets of Manhattan, but they do. And they're really sexy, especially paired with a barely there sundress.

Whereas here, today, it's about 20 degrees cooler than anywhere else. Not cool enough for me to consider buying the Uggs that are, for some reason, still available for purchase, but I may have to pick up a new jacket on the way home. Yikes!

How to lose a guy ...

Whether she's jealous again, or just too hard to handle, now you can kiss her. Kate that is - she's available!

Actress Kate Hudson and her husband, Black Crowes singer Chris Robinson, are splitting, PEOPLE has learned exclusively.

Josh will be thrilled.

Also, what's with the photos of hot blondes today? All we're missing is a little Scarlett ...

Kate Hudson, Chris Robinson Split [People]

This is the Captain's log

New York was great. Once I got there.

Flying when the terror alert has been raised is not fun, although it results in a series of emotions (in approximate order). Stress at the prospect of missing one's second flight. Mirth at the realization that one isn't allowed hand lotion in one's carry-on bag, but that the (small but deadly scissors) that are part of the knitting kit are OK. Relief not to be flying with small or elderly persons (although it would have been nice to have a peer to hold one's place in line while one waited two and a half hours to get through security). Pride at being adult enough to maneuver through the /system/ and get to one's final destination on the same day one had planned (also sneaking suspicion that luck has a great deal to do with it). Further relief because one is on the same plane as one's own luggage (the suit! the shoes!). Slight guilt about sneaking lipstick past the kindly older security guard who pointed at my shoes and called me /princess/. (Little does he know!) Extreme hunger - a girl needs more than an Americano and a pumpkin scone to get through a day. (And yes, I do know how many calories are in a pumpkin scone. So past the point of caring by then, and it was only noon.) General bemusement to be diverted 200 miles northeast to check out Maine when the airspace over JFK is /saturated/. Further bemusement (clearly delirium is setting in at the 15th hour of consciousness and the 8th hour on the plane) at having to land in Hartford to re-fuel. Irrational ability to continue to seek and find the silver lining and inability to stop sharing it with seatmate, who has been separated from his luggage and is rapidly descending into counter-productive but completely understandable anger at American Airlines for refusing to help him find his luggage, which they have transported to JFK, simply because he ended up flying Delta. Irrational fury at a family at baggage claim - 10 year old son chasing 3 year old daughter around and around the epically unmoving baggage carousel, causing her to scream repeatedly, as parents looking on and smile (clearly blood sugar hit an all time low).

Simple appreciation for the silence of the cab driver on the trip from JFK to Soho, and for the friend who waited up. And for the parentheses that make it all possible.

Sashay, chante ... partage?

Don't you hate it when this happens?

While there are numerous enviable physiques at the top of the modelling game, it seems only one can be known as 'The Body'. Two of the world's most famous mannequins appear to be at loggerheads after representatives for both Elle Macpherson and Heidi Klum said their respective clients should not have to share the coveted title.

The FG is taking Elle's side on this one, because Australians are at least twice as hot as Germans, and Elle is one of my all time fav super models. Plus, she's 42.

Elle and Heidi vie for 'Body' Title [Hello!]

Talk about activist judges

A state panel has disciplined a judge who ordered cheers in court for the Super Bowl-bound Seattle Seahawks before issuing a manslaughter sentence.

Pierce County Superior Court Judge Beverly Grant asked about 100 people in court to say ''Go Seahawks'' before taking their seats on Feb. 3. Dissatisfied with the low volume of the response, she repeated the request.

Judge Admonished for 'Go Seahawks' Cheer [NYT]

I heart William Safire: Part Deux

When I was a model UN geek, we went back and forth over Burma/Myanmar - if only Mr. Safire had weighed in earlier:

In 2004, The Times decided to go along with the decision made nearly a decade before by local and national Indian authorities. The paper’s updated style manual decreed: “Mumbai, formerly Bombay. Gracefully remind readers of the former name of the Indian city when necessary.” Craig Whitney, The Times’s standards editor (to whom the wise and honest writers can repair), says: “In 2004, we decided to call it what it was calling itself. If you’ve tried to fly to Bombay on any airline over the past six years, you would find yourself looking up fares and schedules to Mumbai. Clearly, we waited long enough to see if it was sticking.”

Whitney adds: “In general, after a decent interval we call places what they call themselves — Ho Chi Minh City instead of Saigon, Myanmar instead of Burma, Frankfurt instead of Frankfort, etc., though on those first two (and perhaps on Mumbai as well) there are people who object for political reasons.”

The potential for commercial fallout exists. Will Bollywood become Mumblywood? Will the global acceptance of Mumbai — from the Marathi name of the goddess Mumbadevi — by media standard-bearers affect the Bombay Company, a U.S. outfit that sells furniture? Or to Bombay Sapphire gin? (I recommend “Mumbai Safire gin.”) Spokesmen for both companies refuse to speak for the record, but I take it that neither company is thinking of a name change, because they don’t want to confuse customers. The name of a place may be subject to transformation by its residents, but a brand is a brand.

Mumbai, not Bombay [NYT]
Previously: I heart William Safire

Shuesday: Tiene Pluma

These are the shoes that the Scottish Cowgirl lent me for the Thing on Friday. I'm wearing them with an almond suit, a purple sheer silk blouse men's shirt style lined with a camisole and this bag.

As long as the hair doesn't pouf, I think appearances are taken care of. Now, on to practice forming complete sentences!

Come what may ...

If New York were a boy, I would totally date him.

Kudos to Mishy, a student who's getting serious with the subjunctive.

But the real question is, if New York were a boy, which boy would he be? Celebrities facilitate group discussions, but if you're convinced that the kid down the street you kissed the summer you turned 13 epitomizes The City, we're open to a well crafted argument. No limits on age, singlehood vs. coupledom or place of origin - this is New York, afterall - everyone's welcome, dead or alive.

I'll start with The Coop (who also just made Vanity Fair's Best Dressed List ... although as Dr. Rice is also featured, perhaps that list isn't what it used to be.) Who else is a contender?

A picture's worth a thousand nerds

These shoes were hot last Shuesday, but now that I've seen them on 'Is he or isn't he' overhyped Olympian Johnny Weir... not so much.

But I've got a treat for you tomorrow!!!

Johnny Weir Continues to Taunt Us [Gawker]

Further tales of the less than Crocalicious

Warning, in addition to being incredibly unfashionable, Crocs may also be hazardous to the health and well being of those you love! Midwest Medved shared the following story this morning:

You won't even believe this! I was walking up to the coffee place this AM and ran into friends and their daughter who is 5. And the child has a big bandage on her head...so I obviously ask what's going on.

Apparently, while wearing a pair of lime-green Crocs and running, the foot-covering (as you'll agree this is not a /shoe/) came off and she fell forward onto the sidewalk. Got a huge cut, etc, so bad that they went to the ER. Where, get this, they said Crocs are totally unsafe! They get tons of Croc-related twisted ankles, shredded knees, hand and wrist injuries, etc.

Manolo might say: The Crocs they not only kill the soul,but the Crocs they also kill the wearer. The Emergency Room, it is not 'comfortable'.

The FG, she is close to resting her case vis a vis The Crocs.

Previously: Shuesday: Crocalicious

What have I done to deserve this?

So I'm going to the Best Coast next week for work - there's a hotel involved, and I had to share:

AMENITIES

Minimal and romantic, all guest rooms are cast in soft natural tones and fitted with the latest in technology:

• flat-screen TVs
• digital cable
• movies-on-demand
• iPods
• Bose Sound Docks
• two-line telephone
• wireless high-speed Internet access
• DVD player
• Bose Wave radio/CD player
• in-room CD selection
• personal safe
• Frette Egyptian Cotton Bedding
• gourmet mini-bar
• complimentary pet goldfish upon request

The bathroom features:

• Frette bathrobe
• hairdryer
• toiletries from Malin+Goetz beauty line

Complimentary pet goldfish? Oh, I MUST have one of these, I must! Sebastian will be so jealous ...

Consequences

Sometimes we're really just all talk. I'll go back to school/take that art-cooking-writing class/save money/backpack the Himalayas, etc etc and so forth.

And then there are the times when it suddenly hit you squarely between the eyes - there's a chance you'll actually get what you want.

It can scare you to death.

Stop, breathe, recognize and celebrate the shopping opportunities it provides. Take heart in the fact that you already have the shoes. Breathe again. Listen to your favourite music, turn off the phone, do whatever you do on a normal relaxing evening at home. Go to bed early, sleep in a little, and go on with life. But start the list of things that must be done.

And take your own advice already!

Shuesday: I'm falling in love

With the fall collection from Gucci. I know, I know, I don't need a four and a half inch platform sandal in dark red glitter patent leather, but this is fun and borderline practical, right? Although I'm not exactly sure what makes it a moccasin. But there's an entire month before Labor day to wear white ...


Please?