Style style style

I'm still on the fence regarding the Online Shopper column in Thursday Styles. I mean, really, a woman who doesn't own a good pair of non-denim pants? What does she wear to work? Even if she's a freelance writer who doesn't have to negotiate a shared workspace, what does she wear out to a casual dinner? For cocktails, to brunch, or a wedding/baby shower? Are her choices really jeans or a skirt? The cavalier tone of these articles just reinforces the notion that these fashion emergencies are completely fictional.

That said, those pants sound amazing.

Regarding beards, let's start by exploding the myth that women don't like them. If we like YOU, whether or not you have facial hair isn't going to be the dealbreaker for most intelligent women.* We can adjust to any additional exfoliation they may provide. Beards can be added and subtracted with relative ease. I don't recommend them if they're scraggly, or if they reduce you to a pair of eyes and a nose tip surrounded by a burqa-esque cloud of hair. I'm also not a fan of the hair as scarf all over your neck look, but feel free to play with it a little. The very fact that you're willing to experiment with your look says more about you than the actual results, and, as previously noted, you can always grow it back/shave it off. The Renaissance Man shaved his head recently, and the results were amazing. In addition to the striking visual of a bald head in a sea of hair, his blue eyes now POP out of his face.

The FG understands that, after years of compromising your style, the new divorcee may want to let loose a little when it comes to revenge-decorating the new pad. And definitely if you're the one staying in the old pad. But black walls?

He's especially pleased with a purple living room appointed with gray Cappellini chairs, a Paul Smith rug in a rainbow of colors, a black pool table and a photograph by Wang Qingsong, of a Chinese man in a tub surrounded by women. The picture, he said, "screams independence and bachelorhood."

It also screams mid-life crisis, regardless of your marital state. Just don't do it.

*This also applies to any thinning you may be experiencing on top. If we can even see the top of your head, we don't really care. Don't believe me? You haven't been watching Grey's Anatomy, where the hot former model turned surgeon turns down the gorgeous 20-something egomaniac she's been sleeping with to be with the man she loves, a 40-something scruffy-looking guy who's dying of heart failure. Just because it's on tv doesn't make it a lie.